[I meant to post this last week, but I'm doing it now instead]
Today was a bad day.
I don't even want to talk about it. Rare, I know.
(And it has nothing to do with the fact that it took me 3 hours to make one of these bows, although that was really funny).
No, today was real life hard stuff (at least for me) and I'm not even ready to vent to the world yet. But for some reason I remembered this experience I had when I was in high school and it was really motivating for me.
My sophomore year of high school I played volleyball because I absolutely LOVED it. I knew I wasn't great but it came easier to me than most sports and I could play for hours even when I wasn't playing well. My coach was a real pill, however, and really took our volleyball team to a whole new level of dysfunction. She didn't know how to inspire, motivate or teach which is pretty crucial for a coach to do. She would call us names or taunt us from the sidelines if we weren't doing well (really I'm being serious). Needless to say, our numbers were dropping and a lot of girls quit.
For this reason, I was playing varsity as a sophomore and was really out of my league. This woman wanted to turn me into a setter which was not happening. I practiced every spare minute, watching all the training videos she sent home with me or setting against a wall whenever I had a chance, but when it came to game time I STUNK! One day at practice, she had enough of me. I still remember the problem... I was setting 1's too high. She chewed me out in front of everyone, told me I wasn't going to cut it, ordered me to leave and said maybe I shouldn't come back. (although I don't remember her words exactly, it was almost 15 years ago...but I remember being sure my volleyball career was over).
Ouch.
I went home, walked up to my room, and proceeded to cry bitterly. I was so mad at that coach. But mostly I was sad because I really loved playing volleyball. To my surprise, after letting it all out, there was just this quiet feeling that came over me and an extremely reasonable thought came to my head, "if you like playing so much, you should just go back. who cares what she says". Do you ever wonder where extremely sensible, empowering, and revelatory thoughts like that come from? Of course they come from Him. But when I was that age I don't know if I totally understood that. No, it would take me several more years to figure that one out. But it amazes me to this day when those moments come. Answers. Not full answers, usually just partial answers to the problem at hand and they always are perfectly sound, reasonable and peace-bringing pockets of information (although whether they seem reasonable to anyone else depends on who you tell :)). My answers have included things like, "stop crying and go get some sleep, you'll feel better in the morning" or "i'll give you specific answers when you need them but for right now why don't you open the scriptures. you always feel better when you do" or my personal favorite, "yeah, you messed up. but all is not lost. i have a back-up plan. stick with me". Whatever the answer is or is not, it usually includes enough information to get you through the next step. Even if that next step is a little bit humbling or daunting at best.
Even though I was SO EMBARRASSED and kind of wanted to die in my sleep that night, I went back to practice the next day. My coach (a little surprised to see me I think) apologized for losing her head. I didn't set for the rest of the season and instead I found a position that suited me much better. After that, I moved from California *tear* to a school in Utah where I had one of the best coaches ever who helped me build work ethic and confidence. If I do say so myself, I became a pretty good DS. But more importantly, I still love playing that darn sport to this day. I can never get enough when the opportunity presents itself (which unfortunately is rare).
1 comment:
Today I needed a story that could help me see there are ways to make a bad day melt away. Thanks for your post.
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